The Real Me

my Hetero Life-mate

Thu, 02 Aug 2007 18:57:11 GMT

Last night was fun. I didnt want to go out because I had a math test the next day, and had to do work on my Global Business, Trade, and Transportation project, I studied a bit for math and actually accomplished more than i expected on the project, then Greg called me up. he just got home from class and we both realized we havent chilled like we normaly did since he got back from Cruise. so i went to the slope to pick him up, and chatted with nikki and rob a bit on the way there, about nothing really, just updates on school and work. so i pick greg up, get home realize we completely forgot to call Arthur to see if he wanted to come over, but just as we were calling him i remembered i called him in the morning and he said he wouldnt be able to make it out that night so we hung up. Greg and I sat at the dinner table, turned off the TV in the living room, and ate dinner (Spagetti with Shrimp sause made by my father). we talked there for about 30 min, it was really fun, i dont do that too often with close friends of mine, i realized how much older we were than when we first met in highschool, back then, the second we met up, regardless of who's house, we would instantly go play computer games or playstation. So we talked about what was going on in our lives, how work and school was going, and about how much we cant wait to get back to maritime and mess with the incoming M.U.G. class (4th Class, Freshman [military school is fun when there are people below you to do the dirty jobs for you]). so we ate, and we went into my room, i wanted to show him a video of a "3rd strike, wild-pitch, homerun" (if the ball hits the ground on the 3rd strike, you can run, but the catcher forgot this, and didnt tag the batter, so he cassualy walked around the bases). he saw the "conversation" with kaitey other night because i never close my aim box because i like to get back where i leave off with conversations with certain people. he thought it was something. he said "i dont even have the right to say "For once in your life Simon", even though your my bestfriend and ive known you for mad long." he also thought that some of the things said to me were pretty funny on account of them being absolutely untrue (especially things said about him) and contradicting. we closed the conversation laughing.

but thats not the point of this journal entry, its about Greg. Greg, is an amazing person, he's truly pure of heart, although he can be pursuaded a little easier than others, he really does know whats right or wrong in his heart. we sat there on my bed and watched "From Dusk Till Dawn". as we were sitting there, i kept thinking in my mind, how Greg and I are going to be talking about everything we're doing now, decades from now. I told him a secret i've been hiding from him, ive told many other people, but ive never told him. I told Greg that, I picked Maritime, because he was going. no other reason. Its a funny story actually, my father handed me the booklett from Maritime, saying, hey look at this, a Merchant Marine academy, this might be god for you. without pause, i said "No way in hell and i going to a military college." and that was that. for then at least. LITERALLY, less than an hour later, Greg calls me "I found my school, I'm going to maritime." I filled out the online application before we hung up.

we were talking about what life would be like if we went to different colleges, we both agreed that we would both be either, dead, dropping out or, already dropped out. I told him about my old best friend, Tom Salgo. Tom was my best friend since kindergarden, we were in the same class, sat next to eachother on the cheese bus to and from from school. we played N64 almost everyday at his house. up until highschool. He went to Murrow, and I went to Xaverian. We talk maybe once a year. Greg asked, well how far away from you does he live? that may be a factor as well. Tom lives 4 blocks away from me. and we never speak. Its not a tragedy really, we just grew apart. like a quote from a really good song that you should listen to to clear your mind. "Everybody Is Free (To Wear Sunscreen)".. "Understand That Friends Come And Go, But With A Precious Few, You Should Hold On". I feel like Greg and I are going to know eachother for the rest of our lives, and it feels good having that kind of security.

MY Lovely Ladies.

Thu, 26 Jul 2007 00:14:29 GMT

This summer, overall, has to be the best summer of my life so far. Despite all the bitching ive been doing, I'm having the time of my life. My new friends (whom i see daily) are amazing, i love them so much. Theres Rob, who i've known for a while, and he is one of the funniest kids i know. I'm so glad that he finally fond someone, hes always smiling and so giddy lol. Theres Nikolette, ive known her for AGES, she was my link to this new group actually, thank god for facebook, or i dont know what i would be doing this summer (i would prob. be dead, face down in a gutter). Shes so outgoing and entertaining. I love her so much. She always cracks me up whenever she starts acting out her jokes, shes so animated. She knows everyone and everyone loves her to death. I dont know what id do without my Nikki. Madison, omg Madison. First time i met her, i was kinda confused, she was very silent, seemed really shy, didnt talk much. I was wondering what shes doing hanging out with nikki and everyone if shes so shy? but when u get her out of the public, she's insane (in a good way!)! She has soo much energy and is so... i dont even know, she amazes me, she really does, the other week, when we were all at nikolettes house, we were all hangin out in her room, and i was laying on the bed, and Madison came out of nowhere and bit me on my side, right below my ribs, so i naturally bit her back, and started wrestling. Its kinda weird, but you have no idea how loved i felt at that moment, its strange. Madison has Spunk, thats for sure, when she walks into a room, she instantly becomes the center of attention with her crazy antics. Last but CERTAINLY not least, Becky, i swear we were separated at birth, we're on the same exact wavelength, its freaky, i cant even explain how awesome she is. ive only known her for a number of weeks (2 months or so, but whos counting?) and i feel like ive known her for years.

I Love Nikolette
I Love Madison
I Love Becky
I Love Them All

9-11

Mon, 23 Jul 2007 13:41:15 GMT

I was cleaning my computer when i found this, I posted this on a French forum that was discussing everyones opinions on the September 11th attacks. I cant remember how long ago I wrote this, must be bout 3 or 4 years ago.I figured I might as well put it up here because I don't really know what to put up on L.J. anyway.

I live in Brooklyn, I was in school when the attacks on 9-11 happened, but I will never forget where I was, I was in 8th grade math class, it had just started. We had 2 teachers but the female teacher wasn't there, then about 5 min. into class, she rushed in, and whispered something into Mr. Goss's ear (male teacher). i remember exactly what he said "Oh My God."

about an hour later, we learned by word of mouth what had happened, and children's names were being called out, at first, me and my friend thought they were calling the names of the children whose parents were killed. My parents never came to pick me up, I didn't know why. I asked my Mother months later, and she told me "We wanted you to be safe, We wanted you to be in a place where people would know where you are and could help you if possible, School was the safest place for you to be at that moment." that was when i first realized my parents cared more about me and my sisters than their own safety, they would rather never bring me into harms way and never see me again, then take any risk, especially on that day, when we didn't know what could happen next. After school, my mother finally came to pick me up, we picked up a friend of mine, then my other 2 sisters (youngest was still a baby at home) drove my friend to her house, and stayed for about 20 min. Me and Danielle stood outside in the street and it was raining ash. We were about 5 miles away, in the middle of Brooklyn, and it was raining ashes... ashes... it was raining the mixture of police officers, firemen, workers, Americans. we couldn't believe it...

My father called my mom, he told us to come to his work, He runs a nursing home in The Rockaways (The part of Queens where flight 767 crashed, just 10 blocks from my dad's Nursing home.) after the bridge to Rockaway, there is a long strip of road, running almost parallel to the sough shore of Manhattan, and there, my mom pulled over and got out of the car. There we could see all across Brooklyn, we saw the dust and smoke slowly floating south west. This was the first time I saw my mom break down into tears.

Later that night, i had a strange dream. It was cartoony, its hard to say after recreating what i lived through up above.. but the towers fell, and the empire state building was standing there, now the tallest building in NY. and it looked unreal. I couldn't recognize the sky line at all.. and sadly to this day, I still cant. I see it almost everyday when I take the Q train into the city, and when I'm on the bridge I can see all of Lower Manhattan. All i can think about is the people heading to work that day, on the train, looking out only to see a ball of fire...

My dad lost friend that day, he worked in the Trade Center. We thought we lost a family friend, but later saw him on television helping clean up, and escorting people, With all the firemen killed, we thought for sure we had lost him... but thank God we hadn't.

Then in November when flight 767 crashed, all the emotions came back, I thought my father was dead, My father is a huge person in the Rockaway Community, he knows hundreds of firemen and people in the community, I have friends that live literally, 3 blocks away from where the plane crashed. My sister was friends with the girl who's house it was the plane crashed on. She lost her father.

All in all, it was a rough year for a lot of us. However we experienced 9-11, it will be with us forever. I carried a large American flag in my book bag for about 3 months after that, I never told anyone I was doing it, I did it for myself. I felt that, If anything were to happen to me, I wanted people to know that I was proud to be an American, and that I died free.

The thing that touches me the most, is how people from different nations, cried with us... as someone said, "As if Holland were attacked too"

Thank you, For this I love you.

Thank you for reading my story. I hope it gave you a better understanding of 9-11 and how it changed us...

I am always willing to talk about these events.

If you feel like having a conversation, whether to ask me more about what happened, or to tell me your story, My email is IrishMonkey88@yahoo.com
and my Screenname is BlackIrishNY@aim.com

Thank you.

I'm Too Nice

Sun, 22 Jul 2007 19:04:44 GMT

I'm too nice, I've been told that i am for ages, and its true.

I care too much for other people and not enough for myself. I have a lot of love to give and i only want some in return.

I don't understand why some people feel the need to lie to me, over stupid shit.

Lies like:

"You were at that person's house that night, instead of going home like you said"

-what kind of lie is that? i mean really? its the same as going to someone and saying, the sky is purple today...

I put up with people who are reckless with other peoples feelings, i don't know why i do, id rather make someone happy and my unhappy myself.